Thursday, June 30, 2011

This LIttle Thing Called Love From a Runaway Bride

How many times I run from a ring. Now I wonder if I did say to one of them.
To the first one I thought who had love me for a long time. Just asking for my approval sharing life with him earlier than the usual sacrament, for the first time i said no. I was escaping at that time. I was escaping from reaching the man of my dreams. At the end, he gave up on me for the 4th time..and again and again... i lost him for the last time. But I never realized it at that time..
My journey never took a long time and I see myself meeting new people and some old who is coming back. I tried to give myself a chance to open my heart with those who are willing. I waited. I waited with a dangerous mind. I learned to play with what is at hand. I mixed all emotions and dreams  I have had.
With those playful and dreadful predicament, I just say no to those who came even they got ring. Two birds with the same year. I turned them down and I never even cared what they feel.
There's something else I wanted to feel...and it's this little thing they called love. I want to get the ring, my dream and this little thing. I want it in one package. I feel sorry for myself coz with them I mentioned, this little thing didn't come.
My journey continues and I learned to expand my world; meeting a total stranger. It was the time I thought I got the package. And I was delighted with a great surprised! The package I was looking for came. It was until now, the most romantic event in my life...and yes I accepted the ring.
I almost have it all but it was sudden. I got the twist. I am not the one he is looking for. My life tumbled, churned and all the pain I caused with those I rejected came back to me three times painful.
Somebody helped me picked up those broken pieces. I smiled..I laughed once again. Yes, many came but this tough one made me half crazy. I have wanted to leave all the worries behind and enjoy. I insisted to take the risk eventhough I know it seems impossible.
But something happened that I never ever forget...he's even far from what I am looking for...
I can't comprehend and even can't control what is going on...
Now, here I am seeing myself...waiting..hoping Not to RUN AGAIN. 

Friday, June 17, 2011

With Lies and Butterflies

The door was open and never I had double minded entered with the inviting room I found.

Since then, unlocking mysteries I have been made.

My eyes were open with the world you are in.

With all the happiness and sensations your world has taught me,

I even tasted all the pains and sorrows.

The whirling butterflies in my stomach never ends.

With all your lies I found myself captivated.


Supressed emotions and suspended feelings

Have buried deep down in your chamber;

Sleepless nights and unended questions took effect for so long.

You became cold and weary.

How long your facade face of amiable position?

Not until you digged and accepted the fact,

That your present is the product of your past.

You thought it was gone and have reoccured.

Your soul had mastered the right way,

but your heart did not forget ;

They have divided your inner core, what exactly your personality is?

For what still your society has something to do with your actions?

You have learned the ways of both sides

Of evils and angels but they do disguise!

Yourself could tell what have you missed;

contemplated and freed your mind from those memories.

Innocence when you were young

Actions rely to what you seen and feel from them,

It's gone and is irreversible.

Like ignorance you lost in an instant!

You have become knowledgeable

but yet are you wise like them?

To what now, you life is for?

Look at yourself and you will find the answer.


Like a bee sipping at the sweetness of a rosebud,

smelling her fragrance and made her bloom fully,

gazing at her floral character of delicate fragrance...

So it is how a man wins a woman's heart

and expose herself to him.

Like a falling crystal water from the top of the mountain

that gives energy and scenery to mankind,

And so as the intensity of the two lovers

pouring their affection with each other.


Like a bee that stung your hands when you try to catch him,

or the rose with thorns could prick you if you are not careful in handling her

So as how painful two lovers can hurt each other over a simple argument.

Like an eruting volcano that can't hold much heat from the earth's core

that could lead to disastrous floods and tsunamis,

So as the angry two lovers who had fought and had never resolved their personal issues.

Untimely but expectant

Untimely but expectant